(Minghui.org) On my way to work one morning, I suddenly felt my heart sink from hearing the hustle and bustle on the bus I was riding. It was like my heart had been floating on the water and then was suddenly submerged into an unknown substance. I could hear all the noises from my surroundings, yet they had no effect on me at all. Everything happening in the human world was blocked-off by a layer of that substance; my heart remained unmoved and tranquil. I was stunned by that state of mind and, for the first time ever, experienced this indescribable feeling of being assimilated into the Fa .
After this unusual experience, I no longer thought of studying the Fa as a duty to be carried out. Instead, I calmed down to purify my heart before each session, and as I read Zhuan Falun with great reverence, I found the book felt brand new to me. In the past I could finish reading one lecture in just half an hour, yet I felt tired afterwards and wasn’t able to see any new Fa principles. Now I have more energy after reading for an hour and a half. Every page of Zhuan Falun was now showing me Fa principles, and I saw that these principles were in harmony with each other. Through Fa-study, I came to realize the greatness of this Fa and became more confident in my cultivation practice and the eventual success of Fa-rectification.
I cultivate with my third eye closed, so I tended to doubt things that I couldn’t see with my flesh eyes. Due to this strong attachment, I often had trouble deepening my understanding of Dafa. Compassionate Master, however, never gave up on me and encouraged me in my dreams each and every time I was about to give up cultivation. When the persecution began in 1999 and the evil was running rampant, Master let me see in numerous dreams that non-practitioners were to get weeded out. When I became frightened at the persecution that my practitioner wife encountered, Master reminded me in a dream to stay firm in my belief and sent fellow practitioners to help me. When I felt that my predestined relationship with Dafa wasn’t that strong, Master told me in a dream that long ago I was once one of his boy attendants. He even let me see Falun in my dream.
The job Master arranged for me in this lifetime is actually not that demanding, yet I failed to make good use of this good opportunity and wasted a lot of time due to my attachments. The fact was that I didn’t know how to cultivate properly. Recently, through Fa-study I realized I almost never looked within at my own shortcomings. When I did look inward occasionally, all I saw was jealousy of other practitioners who could see other dimensions, and I even complained to Master for not arranging a stronger predestined relationship for me. I found that many of the things I did had elements of my strong attachments and impure heart. As a matter of fact, I was finding excuses for my failure to stay diligent. After realizing my root problem, I worked hard to cultivate my heart by looking within when encountering conflicts and kept removing my impure thoughts. After a period of time, I was better able to stay tranquil and unmoved.
Master said in “Teaching the Fa at the Assistants’ Fa Conference in Changchun,” “To ensure that you can cultivate free of that interference, the part that’s been fully cultivated has to be separated.” I know that as long as we are still cultivating, we are bound to harbor attachments. I have experienced ups and downs in my cultivation, with a lot of attachments still yet to be removed. I am confident, though, that as long as Dafa is there, and I continue to cultivate with determination, I’ll follow Master to return to my true home.