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Minghui Fahui | My Experience of Cultivating Alone

November 17, 2012 |   By a Dafa disciple in Xinjiang Autonomous Region

(Minghui.org) That year I found Minghui by chance, and my wandering heart was completely cleansed upon reading the Minghui articles. I understood that I needed to participate in Fa-rectification period cultivation and to do the three things required of Dafa disciples.

--From the author

Greetings compassionate Master! Greetings fellow practitioners!

When I was in middle school, I learned Falun Gong exercises from a classmate. I usually had no trouble crossing my legs on top of each other, but strangely my legs hurt badly when I tried Falun Gong meditation, and the longest I could sit with my legs double-crossed was about 8-9 minutes. My classmate also lent me the book Zhuan Falun, but then he had to take it back. I had barely skimmed through it once. Even though I had no clue what Zhuan Falun was about, I decided to give Falun Gong a try and set for myself a goal to meditate for 10 minutes in one sitting. About three weeks later, for the first time I was able to cross my legs for 15 minutes. The moment I passed the 15-minute mark, I felt something entering my body, and I immediately became incredibly comfortable. I was a bit scared, since I didn’t know what had happened to me. The next morning I started to vomit and have diarrhea. The symptoms went away just as fast as they came. I was completely fine by the afternoon. This happened in the summer of 1993. Even before I had a clear idea of what Falun Gong was, Master had already installed a Falun in me and adjusted my body. My eyes still become teary whenever I think of this.

After the persecution of Falun Gong began in July 1999, I lost the environment to practice the exercises and study the Fa with fellow practitioners. I gradually gave up my cultivation, and in the years that followed I was preoccupied with finding work and making a living. Before I knew it, it was already 2008. That year I found Minghui by chance, and my wandering heart was completely cleansed upon reading the Minghui articles. I understood that I needed to participate in Fa-rectification period cultivation and to do the three things required of Dafa disciples. Since that turning point, I began my “lone” cultivation, still without an environment to share with fellow practitioners.

1. My family environment is a cultivation opportunity

My father

One day, when I saw my father writing an article praising a deceased Chinese Communist Party (CCP) leader and the evil party, I said to him without thinking, “Dad, the Communist Party is an evil cult.” His emotional reaction shocked me, but I managed to keep my cool. He cursed at me for about half an hour, and I didn’t talk back. In the days that followed, whenever I opened my mouth to talk, I was met with counter arguments and swearing from him. I felt extremely upset. Only later did I realize that as a practitioner I should have looked within whenever I faced conflicts.

The first time I was able to experience the wonder of looking within was after an emotional fight. I sat on my bed with my legs crossed after a quarrel with my father and realized that in my heart I still harbored hatred and a fighting mentality. The moment I dug out those attachments, I felt something spinning on the top of my head, which lasted for quite a while. When I heard my father’s voice again, it no longer bothered me. I knew that Master helped me resolve this conflict after seeing that I identified my omissions.

Before the Chinese New Year holiday this year, I suddenly felt uncomfortable with a stuffy and runny nose. Sending forth righteous thoughts didn’t seem to help at all. On the eve of the Chinese New Year, my father had decorated our house with Chinese paper cut-outs, couplets and lanterns, which all bore the name and logo of our family health insurance company.

I wanted to remove the paper cut-outs taped to the window, but was stopped by my father. Realizing that he was badly controlled by the evil, I decided to wait a few days. However, my sickness symptoms became worse and worse, and the mucus kept running down my nose even during my Fa-study, exercise and sending forth righteous thoughts. Finally, I even had great difficulty breathing. I couldn’t figure out why, but somehow had a vague feeling that my condition had something to do with the decorations. One week later during sending forth righteous thoughts, I suddenly saw a penguin-like figure about my size standing on my right. Since I cultivate with my celestial eye closed, I knew it was compassionate Master who showed me the nature of my interference and reminded me to pay attention.

Two days later I made up my mind to remove all of the decorations my father had put up in our house, no matter how he might react. I first took down the lantern in the living room and then removed the paper-cuts on the window the next day. My father was extremely mad, but I just ignored him and kept studying the Fa. On the afternoon of the Lantern Festival, I ripped the couplets and another paper cut-out as well. My symptoms miraculously disappeared the next day. It was obvious that the evil had hidden itself in those things. Later when I went to clean our old residence, I burned all of the old books written by the evil Communist Party's head leaders and other members.

A veteran and former politics teacher, my father was very proud of himself and filled with CCP's ideology. When I played a Shen Yun Performing Arts DVD for him, he shed tears but didn’t say anything. When I pointed out the farce behind the staged Tiananmen Self-Immolation incident, he argued that any ruling party would have to utilize political tactics in order to survive. When I told him that no law in China had made Falun Dafa illegal, and that many practitioners were illegally arrested, he said that only bad people would be jailed. When I asked him to listen to the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party, he argued that the book was part of a certain group’s plot to take over mainland China. When I tuned in to Minghui radio's “Divinely Inspired Culture,” he dismissed it as superstition. When I mentioned democracy, he claimed that it was capitalist countries’ conspiracy. When I brought up the corruption running rampant in Chinese society, he didn’t feel that was anything unusual. When I talked about my belief, he asked why I didn’t go to the mountains to cultivate.

One day when my father again claimed that there were no Buddhas, Daos or Gods, I asked him: “Dad, didn’t you tell me one morning in 2009 that you saw with your own eyes that a golden, shiny Buddha flew inside from the window? I remember you said the Buddha lingered in one corner of our living room for more than 10 minutes.” He was at a loss for words.

My older brother

My older brother has epilepsy and appeared extremely evil during one period of time. He would utter swear words at the mention of Master and Dafa and rip apart any truth-clarification materials in his sight. I knew that there were many rotten demons controlling him. It was probably because of my cultivation that those low-level beings came to interfere with him. Whenever this happened, even his face appeared deformed.

At first I felt helpless since my brother just wouldn’t listen to me. I also developed very bad thoughts about him. Such thoughts would pop up and keep flashing in my mind whenever I practiced the exercises. My brother would then appear even more evil the next day. This situation lasted for nearly two months. One day I suddenly felt strong fear and wanted to give up cultivation. Then I came across one Minghui article in which the author talked about overcoming a similar experience by memorizing the Fa. When I followed suit, however, Fa memorization didn’t seem to have any effect on diminishing my evil thoughts.

One day the evil thoughts again plagued me. I said to Master in my heart: “Master, if your disciple can’t get rid of these evil thoughts, please completely destroy me. Please never allow me to do any evil things.” I also began to recite the Fa from memory during the entire exercise practice for the whole next month. Then one day as I did the exercises, I suddenly felt something was removed from my head, and my mind immediately became empty. I knew that the evil thoughts toward my brother were eliminated. My brother then began to act less evil. I realized that Master shouldered my pain and enabled me to pass the test.

While my brother and I were chatting one night after dinner, he said, “This person has done so many bad things, yet you still attempt to redress his injustice.” I immediately realized my problem. I answered: “I’m not interested in that person at all. I only brought up his name to show you the evil party’s thinking when it comes to dealing with its people.” He seemed to get what I meant. As he read more news online, he came to see that the Communist Party was indeed very evil.

Last year the local community launched a so-called “promise card” signature drive, which was a campaign intended to force practitioners to promise not to practice Falun Gong. When the community people came to my home, I was a bit nervous. I said to them, “I’m not going to participate in the signature drive and sign my name.” Then I quickly shut the door. However, they knocked on the door again. This time my brother rushed to open it. He questioned them: “Who are you guys? Show me your IDs! I don’t even believe in the Communist Party. The CCP is an evil cult. I’d say you guys should focus your energy on finding jobs for us!” The next thing I heard was footsteps downstairs. My brother had driven the community people away! I was very happy and thought, “Master, my brother is also safeguarding the Fa!”

After this year’s Bo Xilai and Wang Lijun incidents, my brother surfed online to find more about what happened. One day he showed me an article that seemed to frame Falun Gong for what had transpired. I said to him: “Why do you still believe the rumors when you know they’re lies? I am right here in front of you. You should see clearly what Falun Gong is really about after all these years. If I can’t make you believe that Falun Gong is good in three years, I’ll try for the fourth year. If I’m still not successful, I’ll just keep going until you change your mind about Falun Gong.” After this conversation, I never heard him say anything bad about Dafa.

After I dozed off during Fa study for a few days, in order to break through this, I decided to read Dafa books aloud. I read two lectures of Zhuan Falun in the morning and one more in the afternoon. I was surprised to find that my brother didn’t have any bad reactions after I finished reading the whole book aloud. In the past he had cursed at me whenever he heard me read Dafa books. By now I’ve read Zhuan Falun aloud four times in his presence, and he has never said anything. Moreover, his facial appearance returned to normal recently, and so did his tone of voice. There is not much evil controlling him anymore.

For the record, my father and brother never touched the Dafa books I put on my bedside table, no matter how evil they had behaved at times. So it was clear to me that whatever they did was to target my xinxing. Thanks to them, I was able to identify my hatred, heart to seek revenge, jealousy and many other attachments over the years. At the beginning, I tolerated my father and brother because I figured there must be some omissions for me to remove. Then I came to see that they had actually sacrificed tremendously for my xinxing improvement. As such, my tolerance of them transformed more into compassion toward them. As I kept improving my xinxing, layers upon layers of Dafa principles also revealed themselves to me. I knew deeply that it was Master’s enormous suffering and meticulous arrangements for me that helped me balance everything and enabled me to come this far.

Master said,

“In Buddha Law cultivation you have to boldly and vigorously forge ahead.” (Zhuan Falun)

I’ll strive diligently to assist Master in Fa-rectification and will do the three things well in order to be worthy of Master’s grace.

2. Helping my former classmate return to cultivation

The classmate who first introduced me to Dafa had stopped cultivating for a long time. I always wanted to help him return to the path of cultivation. The first time I called him to set up a meeting, I felt nauseated and sweaty, and my vision was blurred. I kept sending forth righteous thoughts and fully recovered two days later, just in time for our meeting. I learned that he had gotten married and had a child. Though we chatted, I had a strong feeling that there was an invisible wall separating us.

This year after Master published “20th Anniversary Fa Teaching,” I wanted to see my old classmate again. How to create an opportunity? I stood in front of Master’s portrait and said in my heart: “Master, I want to see so-and-so. Please help me.” I kept thinking this for several days straight, and then that weekend I received a phone call from my classmate, saying he wanted to meet with me. I was extremely happy and knew that compassionate Master had answered my wish.

When I saw him, he told me that his wife had brought their child to visit her parents, and he had received a call from his workplace giving him a day off while he was on his way to work. I knew clearly that it was Master’s arrangement. My classmate kept chitchatting, and I kept thinking of how to change the topic. After asking for Master’s strengthening, I suddenly got an idea. I interrupted him and said: “I have something important to tell you. Do you want to listen or not?” He tried to avoid answering my question, but I pressed on: “I really want to tell you something, but you have to make your choice. Do you want to listen or not? Is this such a hard decision?” I saw him suddenly breathing hard and unable to say a word. After a while he began to talk again, but in a lower voice. It was obvious that the evil behind him got much weaker.

I stopped him one more time: “You’ve come from a very high level to this filthy word. With such great inborn quality and such solemn responsibility, how can you get lost in the human world? In order to obtain this Fa, you left a god’s realm and glory.” As I said this, my eyes slowly filled with tears. His tears ran down his face, and he kept wiping them off. I knew that Master had targeted the deepest part of his being using my mouth. I also felt the power of compassion myself. That day we talked for a long time. Before we parted ways, he promised to study the Fa and read Minghui.

Two weeks later he came to me again. This time there was no invisible barrier between us. It was obvious that our last conversation had played a role in disintegrating the evil interference. Though we didn’t talk long this time, the effect was very good. I hope he can return to Dafa soon and fulfill his vow.

For these few years I have been cultivating all by myself, while doing the three things required of Dafa disciples. But I have to admit that I've done poorly in face-to-face truth clarification. I've only been able to persuade a few people to withdraw from the Communist Party and its affiliated organizations. I still have various attachments to remove, including being obsessed with political changes in the human world. There are still things with the evil party's marks in my home. There are many areas where I need to do better.

Please point out anything inappropriate.

Thank you, Master! Thank you, fellow practitioners!