(Clearwisdom.net) I recently studied “A Reading Response” in Hong Yin III,
“Born into suffering,
Your pockets were still empty after decades.
Upon gaining the Fa, you soared upward.
Hurry up,
Do well the Three Tasks,
Save all beings,
Return home and don’t slow your steps.”
When reading it for the first time, I was happy since Master was encouraging us to be diligent. After reading it several more times, I was able to memorize it, and I was in tears. I felt that Master had seen that I fell behind, and was asking me to catch up. Master is compassionate, and He does not want any student to slack off.
I usually assumed that I was cultivating well, and some practitioners have also said so. In fact, I have actually cultivated very poorly and almost reached a dangerous point. This is reflected from the multitude of my attachments, such as arguing, defensiveness, seeking comfort, showing-off, etc. Although I am doing the three things every day, the results are not good. I can't concentrate when studying the Fa, can't clarify the truth in depth to save many people, and have been unable to do well in sending forth righteous thoughts or doing the exercises. With so many problems, how can I consider myself a Dafa disciple and catch up with the momentum of Fa-rectification?
I decided to study the Fa with my heart and began to recite the Fa. As I was reading with my eyes, my heart was also absorbing the Fa. After memorizing the first chapter of Zhuan Falun, I felt I had finally grown up—although I am already over 70 years old. As I have matured, I no longer want to argue with others. I feel there is nothing to show off about, and the environment has become harmonious. When sending forth righteous thoughts, I have been able to concentrate better while remaining clear-minded. I felt myself immersed in energy. Some impure thoughts still surface from time to time, but I am able to suppress and eliminate them soon afterwards. During the three hours of group Fa-study, I have been able to remain in the position of fully crossing my legs with my back straight.
While doing well in my Fa-study, I have improved my understanding and removed bad elements. Master said,
“Cultivation depends on one’s own efforts, while the transformation of gong is done by one’s master.” (Zhuan Falun)
The truth-clarification has gone more smoothly, as has the network connection on my computer. Yesterday when first trying to connect to the Internet, I didn't succeed. I didn't become frustrated, but instead sent forth righteous thoughts and asked Master for help. When I tried again, a dialog box appeared on the screen, asking if I wanted to upgrade the software. I clicked “Yes.” The connection succeeded very quickly, and I was able to overcome the Internet blockade. I then successfully submitted a name list of 125 people who had quit the Chinese Communist Party and its affiliated organizations. I know that Master was helping me, and I am very grateful for it.
The above are my personal understandings. Please point out anything inappropriate.