(Clearwisdom.net)

Sickness tribulation befell me suddenly towards the end of last year until March of this year. It was so severe that I had to gasp for breath at each step while going upstairs. I constantly coughed up a lot of phlegm and felt exhausted. Even though there was a lot of pain, it was definitely not cardiovascular disease or asthma.

I calmly looked inside myself - the old forces couldn't drag me down this hard without an excuse - and I started to look for what big omission I could have fostered during my twelve years of cultivation. I even had the fleeting thought that I could not make it in my cultivation. But as soon as I had that thought, I immediately knew that it was not right. Even if I have an omission, I wouldn't allow the old forces to persecute me. I must deny it. I started asking Master for help and sending forth righteous thoughts ten times a day. I stopped all tasks in producing truth clarifying pamphlets and just calmly studied the Fa, reading one to two lectures per day. I also asked fellow practitioners to help me to send righteous thoughts. My situation gradually improved for the better after more than one month of severe tribulation. Fellow practitioners shared my experience with one another.

Yet, the most important lesson was the loss of three months of making truth clarifying materials.

What was my significant omission? After seeking inside myself sincerely, it was clear: I had not cultivated diligently.

I cultivated for twelve years, yet over half of the time I honestly did not truly cultivate, I did not even practice the exercises. I devoted all of my time to making money in my business and to getting married. There is nothing wrong with doing business or even getting married, but I was so attached to an ordinary human life. I did not truly study the Fa, I did not seriously send righteous thoughts, and spent most of my time on my personal issues. It is downright frightening just to think about that now.

I already had two illness tribulations, and this was the third one, the most severe one. This time I had been in a state of indifference about cultivation. I could not study the Fa with concentration. Sometimes I did not study the Fa or studied very little. I remained complacent though, thinking that I was so busy producing truth clarifying material. I kept thinking about other things during righteous thoughts and ended up just performing the task like a ritual. Day after day, this state of indifference persisted for more than two years. I seldom practiced the exercises. I thought doing Dafa projects could substitute for exercises. What a huge omission! I only realized this when the illness tribulations hit me hard.

Master emphasized over and over in his lectures that we must study the Fa no matter how busy we are, and we must study the Fa with a calm mind. I just did not cultivate solidly with my heart, I did not have true faith in Master and the Fa. This was a serious lesson, and a bitter lesson.

From now on I will study the Fa no matter how busy I am, and I will never substitute cultivation with Dafa projects. Cultivation is very serious. I am close to 70 years old. Master said,

"But there's just one condition. The time that your life is extended for beyond your predestined, original course of life, that time is solely for you to practice. If your thinking goes even a little off track it'll put your life in danger, because your course of life ended a long time ago." (Zhuan Falun)

I hope others who have had similar problems in their cultivation will awaken to it and return to the right path as soon as possible. We must cultivate solidly until the end. Only by doing so can we save sentient beings. We must be worthy of Master's mercy.