CULTIVATION STORIES

When I was just a small child, still too young to go to school, I remembered thinking; "I have to leave this world as good as when I came into it." I worried about how I could ever do that, because even then I realized that being "good" was neither simple nor easy.

Nothing--no religion, psychology or philosophy--ever credibly explained how I could accomplish what I knew I must. Not until I began to read Zhuan Falun did I see for the first time the order behind our actions. I understand that I could not only atone for the pain I caused in this lifetime, but I could also undo the wrongs I committed in previous lifetimes. More remarkably, I would receive help. Some of the karma would be eliminated for me.

Once I started reading Zhuan Falun, I felt a strong urge to continue. I easily decided that this was the way I wanted to look at the world, whether or not I accepted everything as true. Almost immediately, the practice filled my mind, and I began to measure every thought, word, and action by this new standard: Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance.

When I was first introduced to the exercises and saw people sitting cross-legged on the ground I said, "I don’t think I can do that." I injured my back 35 years ago when I fell down some stairs. At the time, I was pregnant and carrying a child in my arms. To protect the child in my arms, I took the fall on my back. The injury left me unable to ride in a car for any length of time or sit cross-legged without experiencing pain. For 35 years, I tried to avoid these activities, but every now and then a car ride would be too long or I would make the wrong move and would have to recover from the pain. But when I gingerly sat down to do a very modified knees-up, cross-legged sitting posture (because by this time I had lost my flexibility), I felt no warning pains. Nor did the pain come the next day as I expected. I drove all day long to attend the conference in New York in 1999, and I still had no problem with my back.

Since then I have observed my body reacting differently to the environment, and I think differently about illness. For example, in the winter before I began the practice, I had a sinus infection and a high fever that lasted for 10 days. My doctor was very concerned and warned me that from then on I had to either have an operation on my sinuses or have regular acupuncture treatments to prevent a recurrence. The next winter, when I once again had a fever and developed the symptoms of sinusitis, I reminded myself that I am a practitioner. The next day the symptoms were gone. It seems that no illnesses come to bother me any more. Occasional discomforts that others might label as symptoms of an illness might still come and go, but those are short lived and they do not make me feel ill.

Recently, I have been trying to balance my need to clear away my last medical issue without causing my very caring doctor to feel personally rejected or a failure. My story is as follows.

Half of my thyroid gland was removed 35 years ago. I was told that because this gland controls other glands, I would have to take thyroid hormone for the rest of my life. Also, I would have to have my hormone levels tested regularly. When I discovered that many Falun Dafa practitioners do not need to take medicine, I thought that it was expecting too much of Falun Dafa to restore the function of a gland that had been surgically removed. However, I also thought, "At my next routine test I will check my level and request that my doctor test my levels more often, so that I will be able to gradually cut back on my medication." After the blood test, I received a rather panicky message from my doctor asking me to come in to see her right away. She told me that my level was extremely high, and it was dangerous for my heart. Instead of being concerned, I was pleased because I understood that I no longer needed the medication.

I could have simply stopped going to see my doctor and stopped having tests at that point, but I thought of how my doctor would feel if I did that. Instead, I decided to involve her in what I was doing and in making decisions. I have been fortunate enough to have an open-minded doctor who will go to any length to find a natural solution to a problem rather than prescribing a drug. She is interested in what I am doing as a practitioner and wants to know more about it for personal reasons. I lent her the book China Falun Gong. Perhaps because she has been reading about Falun Dafa, she was not surprised when I told her that I had decided not to take any more thyroid medication. She simply gave me a requisition for a blood test "in case I should have problems," thereby fulfilling her responsibility as a doctor.

Although my pulse rate has gone up to 90 beats per minute, and then a few days later dropped down to about 60 beats per minute, and although my thyroid levels have soared and dropped, I have felt fine all the time. I am truly grateful for all the above and more.

(Adapted from Ms. Gillis’s presentation at the 2000 Toronto Falun Dafa Experience Sharing Conference.)

My original purpose for cultivating Falun Dafa was to improve my physical health. The more I understood Dafa, the more Dafa meant to me. It’s so great. In one year I changed from a patient seeking a cure to a practitioner melting her life into the Fa (Buddha Law). Dafa transformed me.

All my family moved to Belgium in 1996. I worked temporarily in a restaurant to make a living. I developed amenorrhea due to the great stress of the language barrier and a heavy workload. The discomfort accompanied me all the time. I went to see the doctor. I was diagnosed as having early menopause. I couldn’t believe it. I was only about 30 years old! How could I be in that state at such an early age? In order to heal my illness, I went back to China and visited specialists in Western and Chinese medicine. I took a lot of medicine; however, none of it worked. I went to see a gynecologist after moving to Toronto. He couldn’t do anything about it either and suggested that I see an endocrinologist. The endocrinologist conducted many tests. He told me that it was incurable and suggested that I try some other treatment. Everybody knows that the earlier you have menopause, the greater the risk of incurring other diseases. I started to practice Falun Gong to heal my illness.

Initially, I didn’t understand what I was doing very well. I read the book while taking medicine. One day shortly after taking my medicine, I felt dizzy, sick, and weak. Suddenly, I realized that I was already a practitioner: Master already cleaned up my body. I didn’t have any diseases any more, so why did I still take medicine? My body stopped experiencing discomfort after I threw out all my medicine. My menstruation returned. When some of my friends found out about it, they were all convinced by the healing miracle. They even helped me spread Falun Gong.

I have been reading Zhuan Falun every single day since I became a practitioner. I do feel that the improvement of Xinxing (mind-nature) is the key to our cultivation. I do home care for elders. Sometimes I am beaten up and yelled at during my work. Dafa got rid of my attachments to fear of dirt, fatigue, and hardship. Among all the old people I have taken care of, there are two who are almost 90 years old. Due to the lack of care, their homes were very dirty: Cockroaches were running around the room, feces were left on bathtubs and chairs, and urine was all over the bathroom floor. When I was assigned to their homes, I didn’t feel like taking these jobs at all. I still remember the first time I went to their homes. They were so dirty that I had nowhere to stand, and I complained to my company immediately. As a result of studying the Fa (Buddha Law) more and having a better understanding, one day I realized that, as a practitioner, I could never achieve consummation if I were afraid of dirt, fatigue, and hardship. I got rid of those fears right away when this idea arose. After that, I didn’t feel dirty anymore. I took everything I did for them as a practitioner’s compassion. Consequently, I am happy and patient doing my work.

Once, I went to a paralyzed patient’s home. As soon as he saw me, he started to complain that his diaper was a bit wet. He asked me to change it for him right away. I said, "Wait a second, I will help you get up first." When I was lifting him up, he suddenly shouted at me with his eyes staring, "I will beat you up, I will beat you up!" Together with his shouting, his fists started to fall on me. At that moment, I guarded my Xinxing well. I said to him, "I am sorry," even when he kept beating me. I was very calm at the time, but my heart was moved a little bit that night. I felt a little bit sad, wronged, and that I was losing face. I always thought that I had been very nice to him. I worked very hard, and I sweated all over from showering him. I kept thinking how little I was paid for the job and couldn’t really calm down for a few days. On looking into my mind, I found that there were a lot of complaints. I didn’t do a good job according to a practitioner’s standard. I could see selfishness and fear of hardship. These tribulations were just helping me out. Every trial and tribulation is for getting rid of my attachments. After calming my heart, I found everything around me became friendly again.