By a Chinese practitioner in the U.S.　　　

　　The first time I heard about Falun Gong was back in May 1994, when I went back to China to visit my family. I quickly lipped through Zhuan Falun and found it too deep to understand. After we returned to the States, my husband couldn't stop talking about how good Falun Gong is. I kept wondering how he, with a doctoral and a master's degree in science, could be so into qigong. he first time we received the audiotapes of Master Li's Nine-Day Lecture in Jinan, my husband and I anxiously finished the tapes within two days. I was saying to myself, “So, that was the truth of life! It sounded reasonable, but is it real?” How could I give up the idea of seeking material interests as the purpose of life? It was too difficult for me.　　

　　Then in October 1995, my mother died of cancer. I was in deep shock and thought a lot. I couldn't understand why she would leave this world at the age when she could enjoy her life after decades of hard work. Under the influence of my husband, I tried to read the book several times but never finished it due to the strong attachments I had and other forms of interference.　　　

　　In March 1997, I was fortunate enough to attend the　Falun Dafa Conference in New York City and listen to Master Li's lecture. At that time I still had not finished reading Zhuan Falun and was full of all kinds of attachments. I had only vague ideas of what Master Li was saying, but I could feel an unspeakable force shaking very hard in the bottom of my heart. After the conference, my husband asked me if I would become a true cultivator. I said yes. Then, the very next day, my watch and diamond ring disappeared when I was staying at my friend's house. hey were nowhere to be found.　　　

　　I also faced tribulations and conflicts with my mother- in-law. I have never been able to get along with my mother- in-law since I married my husband. I am a strong-minded person. I'm always concerned about how other people think of me and fear their criticizing or taking advantage of me. My mother-in-law is a straight-forward person with a sharp tongue, and she favors her son. In her eyes, I can never do right while he is never wrong. When I had my first child in 1995, she came to help and stayed with us. There were conflicts, one after the other. I was very stressed out and upset to the point that I couldn't stand her any more. I complained to my husband constantly. He turned around and tried to comfort me by showing me what Master Li said in Zhuan Falun, but I just couldn't get over the fact that I had to abide by Dafa, enduring and forgiving. After attending the conference in 1997, I realized that I couldn't keep avoiding the obstacles. I made up my mind and prepared myself for anything to come. Sure enough, the next day when we were doing housework together, my mother-in-law started complaining about me sarcastically. Since I was prepared, I was able to keep my composure the whole time.　　

　　After that I thought I did pretty well. During that period, I stayed home raising my child and did not go out much. Life was quiet and simple, but my mind did not remain quiet or tranquil. The unfairness and negative comments from my mother-in-law kept popping up in my mind. I did not pay much attention to it at first, but gradually I started to get into fights with her in my mind. Even though I had started practicing the exercises, I did not spend much time reading Master Li's books. I was the same person. Nothing had changed deep in my heart. I became resentful. I even felt that I was rather stupid not to protect my own interests when I was tested. I should reason with her and decide who is right and wrong. Little by little I went back to being an ordinary person.　　　

　　Although I had stopped studying the teachings and exercising, I still liked to watch videotapes of Master Li's lectures at various locations and read other practitioners' experience-sharing articles. Feeling depressed, though, I was not willing to let go of my attachment to fame, interests and sentimentality. Dafa sounded great but it was impossible for me to live up to.　　　

　　The problem dragged on until March 1998, when my husband went to the New York conference and brought back Master Li's lecture tapes. Once again I picked up Zhuan Falun. I told myself this time that I should not put down the book until I finished it. Finally, four years after I first heard about Falun Gong, I finished Zhuan Falun, and once more I became determined to be a true cultivator.　　　

　　Immediately following came a test regarding sentimentality between husband and wife.　I was very sentimental and self-pitying, valuing very much the affection between husband and wife. My heart would twist and turn whenever my husband did not treat me right or pay attention to me. It was impossible for me to take this sentimentality lightly, let alone give it up. his attachment had been a big barrier preventing me from being a true cultivator. During that time, for whatever reason, I did not get to spend much time with my husband, and I felt neglected. It seemed as if it were all his fault. I tried to talk to him a few times, but my effort was in vain. I was confused. Once when I was reading, I came across Master Li's words: "Whenever there is interference of one kind or another in qigong practice, you should look for reasons within yourself and determine what you still have not let go."　 (Zhuan Falun) Later in a discussion with another practitioner on the issue, she quoted Master Li as saying we should look inward whenever there is a conflict. I realized that the real cause of the issue still was inside of me, no matter how it looked to be his fault superficially. My emotions weighed too heavily on me. I was accusing my husband, feeling my own interests were hurt. I was covering myself using Master Li's words and going against the true nature of the universe. Having realized the truth, I still found it too hard to let go of the attachment. Feeling the pain of not being able to let go of the attachment, I kept reading the books to help resist the evil thoughts and gradually I found the attachment becoming more and more trivial. Gradually my relationship with my husband became harmonious. I have never felt so relieved in my life.　　　

　　I am a full-time working mother with a two-year- old and a four-year-old. Every day I get up at the crack of dawn and by the time I go to bed, it is usually ten or eleven o'clock. I squeeze in time to read and exercise when the kids are playing after dinner. I used to play with my kids inattentively and try to hide myself away from them whenever I could. The less I wanted them to find me, the more they would find me. Sometimes I wished I could have a cultivation environment like practitioners with no children. With such a wrong mentality, I had little patience with the kids. Sometimes I was angry with them. Very soon, I was asking myself what had happened and where was my compassion? Why couldn't I always put others before myself? Isn't the most difficult environment the best opportunity for improvement for a practitioner? So I started watching Master Li's nine-day lecture videos with them and I read Zhuan Falun to them. Since I have calmed myself, the children have changed as well. My four-year-old insists on having me read the book when he goes to bed. he little one doesn't allow me to turn the light of until she falls asleep, so I can read while sitting by her bed.　　

　　Even though I made up my mind to be a cultivator again in 1998, I still failed to improve the bumpy relationship with my mother-in-law. I had chosen to stay away from her to minimize unnecessary contact. At the beginning of this year, my parents-in-law decided to visit us again in the U.S. I was quite nervous at the time and did not wish them to come. I told my husband, "We are absolutely able to take care of our kids by ourselves. All you want is to lie back, since your parents will help you. What's wrong with us enduring a bit more hardship?" I knew that I was wrong, but still used Dafa as an excuse to cover myself up. Believe it or not, my parents-in-law decided not to apply for visas after all. he trip was postponed. I thought to myself that I had lucked out　　　

　　I attended the New York Falun Dafa conference in March of 1999. I was deeply moved by other practitioners' cultivation experiences, and I was also able to find where I lagged behind. The day after I came back home, my parents- in-law phoned and said that they were going to apply for visas. Several days later, we learned that they would visit that May. At this time, I began to calm down and realized that my attachment could not be gotten rid of without a difficult environment. My "fear" of facing my mother-in-law was in itself an attachment that I must let go of.　　　

　　On the day of my in-laws’ arrival, I volunteered to pick them up at the airport. For the following days, I encountered many opportunities to improve my character. Sometimes I was able to overcome the obstacle and sometimes not. here were occasions when I seemed to conduct myself according to Dafa, but it was not from the bottom of my heart. When that happened, the same obstacle would occur again. In every conflict, if my attachment surfaced, the atmosphere would change negatively too. After arriving, my parents- in-law planted many kinds of vegetables in the back yard and spent a lot of time and effort gardening. One day after I came back from work, my mother-in-law told me that some of the newly grown plants were cut evenly, as if by a pair of scissors. She questioned me and made oblique accusations. I immediately sensed that she suspected me. I felt unfairly treated and upset. Very soon I calmed down and realized that what had just happened was not accidental. I did not have the right mindset when I was answering her questions and was only concerned about being wrongly blamed, and I did not put myself in her shoes. Once I calmed down, I started to help her find out what had happened to the plants. Later I put a garden fence around the vegetables. A few days later, my mother-in-law told me that she had discovered that it was a squirrel that had eaten the plants.　　　

　　During one of the conversations with my husband, I said that my mother-in-law seemed to have changed this time. He responded, "I don't think she has changed. She still speaks the same way and treats you the same way. It is you who has changed." Before going back to China, my father-in-law said to me, "You have become mature since you started practicing Falun Gong. Your mother-in-law has not made any negative comments about you in front of me yet." My mother-in-law also said to me, "How can you be so energetic after a long busy day?"　　　

　　Ever since July 1999, Dafa has encountered unprecedented tribulations. Like many other practitioners, I went to Washington D.C. While there, I had many opportunities to work with other practitioners to promote Dafa. I saw how other practitioners were always trying to understand everything based upon the principles of Dafa. Whatever they did or said, it always had to be with compassionate hearts and a calm and peaceful manner. By contrast, I found myself nervous, unsettled, and easily excited, but I realized that it was indeed a good cultivation environment and I found myself understanding quite a bit.　　　

　　Initially I thought I would be in D.C. for only a day. After I arrived, I felt that I should stay longer. Then I was wondering how to ask my boss for time off. I work for a small company and I have responsibilities that are difficult for others to cover. here was a project pushing a deadline. However, I had only one thought in my mind: I had to stay even at the cost of my job. I phoned my boss and tried my best to explain to him the situation and my willingness to make up with overtime as soon as I got back. My boss was not very happy and hinted that I might lose my job. After the conversation, I was worried most of the day. Letting go of the attachment of personal interest is always easier said than done. After repeated mental struggles, I uncovered my attachments of fear, fame and personal gain. After coming back from D.C., I had a frank conversation with my boss. I also completed my project on time. Two weeks later, my boss gave me a raise.　　　

　　Looking back at my cultivation path, I nearly passed by Dafa. Master Li's benevolence has been giving me opportunities all along. He handed me this great law of the universe and helped purify my body. Master Li takes every single opportunity to help me abandon all my attachments to become a true practitioner. He helped me discover the truth of life. I know I still have a lot of attachments to get rid of and have a long way to go in my cultivation. However, Dafa is deeply rooted in my heart. Nothing and nobody can shake my determination and resolve to be a true cultivator!