By a Chinese practitioner in the U.S.　　　

　　In May of 1997, while I was working in New York, I watched Master Li’s entire set of the nine-day seminar tapes without sleep or rest. While I was watching, I rejoiced at being able to find this great teacher, and to learn the purpose of being a human and the principles of cultivation practice. Soon afterwards, I borrowed tapes of Master Li’s various lectures and Dafa books.　　　

　　Though I had read all the Dafa books and practiced the exercises daily, I did not understand cultivation practice in daily life. In the beginning, I seldom joined the local group studies or discussions, as I had read Zhuan Falun several times and thought that I understood it pretty well. Later, I did participate in group discussion, and I found that I also went through some tribulations faced by other practitioners. But I had not treated the tribulation as a practitioner should, and let it go. I did not try to understand, and was even confused. Why did other practitioners go through tribulations one after another, while I did not experience any? In fact, it was not that I did not face any tests, but rather that I did not act according to Dafa's requirements. When faced with a tribulation, I neither examined myself for the cause, nor did I accept it as an opportunity for progress. I would assess the difficulty in the manner of an ordinary person and look for a way out. Thus I missed again and again the opportunities for cultivation. Not until that day did I realize the importance of group study and group practice. In such a cultivation environment, practitioners are able to share cultivation experiences to encourage each other and to improve together. This is especially good for getting rid of our attachments and it is the fastest way for improving ourselves. Master Li said, “To tell you the truth, the entire cultivation process for a practitioner is one of constantly giving up human attachments.”(Zhuan Falun) From then on, I began to regularly join group Dafa study and group practices.　　

　　In the past few years, competition between long distance telephone companies has become more and more intense. They employ various means to attract customers, such as rate reductions, monthly fee waivers, and even cash rewards. I also became one of their targets. Favorable terms given by one firm were bettered by another. At first, I was unwilling to switch telephone companies, because I did not want the trouble. It was also because I thought, “How can I get another’s money with no good reason?” hen I was told that it only takes a few minutes to switch companies; we would not only enjoy lower rates, but also would get a cash reward. At that time, I was laid-of and did not have much to do, so I decided to give it a try. After such a try, I immediately felt the benefit. It was only two to three weeks after I switched companies, and another firm called me up and gave even more favorable terms. The company representative even said, “What are you worrying about?” I was saying to myself: It is not I who asked for it, and this is the way they do business. Don’t worry about it, they are happy and I'm happy, too. So in just two months, I switched telephone companies three times and felt pleased with myself. Not long afterward, the telephone bill came. I looked at it. What was going on? How could only two to three long distance calls cost three hundred dollars? The firm had a rule that if customers switched to their firm and did not stay for a full three months, not only would they have to return the original cash award, but also they would be charged at the highest rate! With some calculation, I found all the money that I made by switching telephone companies had to be paid out now. I suddenly realized that as Master Li says: “No loss, no gain.” I realized that this was a test to see if I coveted material gain. But I did not understand and failed the test. Instead I traded my virtue again and again in exchange for “favorite benefits,” and did not treat myself as a practitioner.　　

　　This incident greatly exposed my attachment to material gain. I still remember when I first began to learn Dafa that I had said to myself the crux of Falun Dafa cultivation is to assimilate to the cosmic characteristic of Truthfulness, Compassion and Forbearance, and to get rid of human attachments to fame, material interest and sentimentality. At that time, I thought that I was not keen on fame or material interests. I thought my cultivation should focus on sentimentality. It seems now the so-called “not keen on fame or material interest” was simply from an average person’s point of view. Having learned Dafa, I must live up to a higher standard.　　　

　　I used　to work in New York. Due to company restructuring, many of the staff members were laid off. I also lost my job, so I returned to Boston. I had just studied Dafa for two weeks. I wasn’t very unhappy, and vigorously started to look for a new job. I thought that since I started late learning the Fa, such an arrangement would allow me time to catch up. From then on, every day, I would practice the exercises, read the Fa, and watch Master Li's lecture videotapes.　　　

　　Half a year went by. Others had already found jobs, but I still had not settled down yet. It is not that there were no companies interested in me. In those few months, each month there were two to three job interviews. Some companies had even gone through all the procedures and were only waiting to choose a good date for me to begin the job. But for some unknown reasons, my starting date was postponed again and again. I simply could not start a new job. In the beginning, I found many objective reasons: the companies merged and so froze the payroll; managers let the company; the plan for new hiring changed etc… I experienced every one of the above. Then there came the Asian Financial Crisis, and many financial firms began massive layoffs. For myself, who specialized in Asian economies, it was yet another blow. I considered myself to be a good person. I did not have strong attachments to fame or material interests. I did not seek high living standards. Wherever it is, whatever it does, as long as the job utilizes my specialty, and as long as the salary is commensurate with my experience and capabilities, I would be content. I did not realize, however, I was obstructed in the improvement of my character just because of such a way of thinking.　　

　　One night, I received a telephone call from an executive director of a large investment firm. He said that I was recommended to ill a position analyzing Asian economies and stocks. After we spoke briefly, I felt the job it me very well, as it suited my strengths and specialty. He was also very satisfied and prepared to offer me an interview with his associates. But as we discussed further, a conflict emerged. On discussing the topics of Asian stocks and Asian economies, I totally forgot myself, as if I were an authority. I started talking bombastically, and even started to argue with him. Each sentence was filled with the mentality of showing of and the mentality of competing. My daughter described my conversation to me: “If it was written down, every word would be in bold and each sentence would have an exclamation mark!” After the telephone call had finished, my wife said, “With your way of talking, it would be surprising if anyone would hire you. You have had so many interviews, why were they all unsuccessful? You should look into yourself for answers.” hat’s right. Master Li said that when there is a conflict you should look inward, instead of outward. How could I have spoiled such a great opportunity? Why? Recalling the entire course of　he phone interview, I found that my words were filled with the attachment to fame. I exploited every opportunity to show that I was a professional and an expert. I was jealous that others were better than I was. Facing a conflict of opinions, I was arguing for my self-esteem to prove that “I’m right and you’re wrong.”　　　

　　That night I thought a lot. Seeking fame, status, benefits and recognition from society are attachments to fame that are easily detected. Through studying the Fa, I have become less concerned about fame and material interests. But my attachment to fame had deep roots back to the days in elementary school when I began competing for rankings in school. After I started working, I was seldom satisfied with my own position and was always ready to switch to a better one. I always thought that I was better than others. I used every chance to flaunt my knowledge and abilities, and to have others see me as someone amazing and extraordinary. This kind of attachment to fame and material interests, compared to the kind mentioned above, is more subtle, and not as easily detected. That is why I used to always feel unfortunate and why I felt others didn’t understand me. Only at this time did I recognize that according to the standard of Dafa, I not only did not relinquish the attachment to fame and material interests, but the attachment had been developing since my early years. Such attachments had deep roots, permeating every aspect of my life. Often, when I met a new friend or colleague, I would naturally ask which school he graduated from and the ranking of the department. Such attachments to fame also affected my child’s education without my noticing it. here seemed to be a general understanding that she would not attend any colleges other than Harvard or MIT. This invisibly generated unnecessary pressure for her. And thus for some time she reported only the good news and not the bad, for fear that she might get criticized for not meeting her parents’ expectation. Was I teaching her something good or bad?　　　

　　Thinking about this, I suddenly realized that the entire process of finding a job was in fact the best opportunity to cultivate myself. In such a process, my attachments to fame and material interests were fully displayed to me. Through looking inward, my anger cooled. Not long afterwards, I finally got a position at a financial firm in Boston.　　　

　　Master Li said: “As a human being, you are a good person only if you can follow this universe’s characteristic of Zhen-Shan-Ren.” (Zhuan Falun) Master Li also said: “As a practitioner, if you assimilate yourself to this characteristic you are one that has attained the Tao—it’s just such a simple principle.” (Zhuan Falun). After considering the three aspects, Zhen, Shan, Ren (Truthfulness, Compassion, Forbearance), I found that I was the worst at Forbearance. I had to work on Forbearance. But even then I didn’t think carefully about why I could not forbear. I thought at the time that if someone hit me or cursed me I would probably be able to forbear because I had learned from reading the teachings that I had to forbear it. I also thought though that I may not be able to truly remain unmoved in my heart. I thought that I should improve step by step. Since my character did not improve, whenever a tribulation came, I would not be able to forbear. To save face, I would always grumble and talk back. It was only after the tribulation that I realized that I should have forborne. The reason why I couldn’t stay unmoved in my heart was that I didn’t improve my character and dig down to the fundamental reason why I could not forbear. After two years of cultivation I gradually realized that the reason I could not forbear was that I was still attached to fame and personal gain. When I encountered a tribulation I never looked inward but I always looked externally for reasons, trying to give myself some evidence that I was right. That was why I had to reason with others until they agreed with me. If I couldn’t reach my goal then it was impossible for me to continue to forbear. Outwardly it is not being able to forbear, yet from a deeper level of understanding it is also not possessing enough compassion.　　　

　　Saving face exposes the attachment to fame. When one competes and fights to save face, or to protect his own material interests, one will not consider saving face for other people, nor will he think of others first all the time and he wouldn’t be compassionate to others. So that’s why there is compassion in forbearance, and why, when I didn't possess enough compassion, I would not be able to be broad-minded either, nor be able to always forgive others’ mistakes, nor be able to let go of my material interests. As a practitioner I should act as Dafa directs and think more of others. Only in this way will I be able to look inward when encountering tribulations. In the process I shall upgrade my character, remove all my attachments, assimilate to the cosmic characteristic,　Truthfulness-Compassion- Forbearance, and quickly return to my true self.